I have been wanting to get back into blogging now that the holidays are over (which were insanely busy!) but this is definitely not the post I had planned for today. Since I already wrote everything I felt in my heart on Facebook this morning, I’m just going to copy that here into this post. If you have ever lost a family pet, a family member or close friend, I can assure you that you may know exactly how myself and the rest of my family is feeling right now…my husband in particular since this was his dog before we got together. I quickly fell in love with him and the bulldog breed. He was friendly and loyal and he followed me around the house everywhere. Being that I’m home all day, I’m pretty much with him 24/7 so his absence is greatly felt already.
I wish I had happier things to post about today but this is real life and our Diesel was like family. He was a HUGE part of our family and will be forever missed and loved. At this point I can only be thankful that he spent so many years together with our family. He was 11 and the lady who was working with us at the vet today seemed to be surprised by old he was. She told us we must have given him a great life.
As soon as my head hit my pillow in bed last night I got a serious sinking feeling and opened my eyes up real wide – as if that would tell me something. My heart was immediately heavy and it felt like there was a black cloud around. I couldn’t explain it and have never felt anything like it. It felt like something was going really wrong at that moment or that something really bad was about to happen…so I prayed for everyone I knew and gave it all to God.
When Roger woke up for work this morning, he went to say goodbye to Diesel (like he does every morning) who is usually snoring away on his bed at the foot of our bed… and knew something was wrong because it was so quiet. No snores. Nothing. Diesel passed away in his sleep overnight and heaven gained an angel doggy. When I gave it all to God just before falling asleep, I had no idea he was taking Diesel.
This old man followed me around everywhere. I will miss his presence, I will miss finding his hair on everything, I will miss the drool marks he’d leave on the couch, I will miss helping him get up onto the couch (and our bed when he’d take naps with me), I will miss him barging into the bathroom using only his face… but most of all, I will miss his spirit and his snores. His snores rumbled the floor and were always so comforting to me. Already now our house is so very quiet. The silence is deafening. I’m thankful he had such a happy life but I miss his spirit so, so much already.
Now I suppose it’s time to mope around some more and talk about what me miss most. Diesel was everything you could ever ask for in a dog. Everyone who met him fell in love with him. Well, anytime he wasn’t drinking water and then rubbing his wet jowls on your clean pants anyway. ;)
If you have ever lost a pet, my heart is with you. I know how difficult it is because they ARE our family.