If you’ve been reading my blog for any length of time you can probably tell that I’m not very open. If you’re a private person like me, you know opening up is hard, right? I try to be but I’m naturally a very private person so it’s something I struggle with. I continue trying to be better about it because I know reading about workouts (mostly) gets old. Although this blog is mainly about fitness and healthy living, that is definitely not my entire life – just one of the many important parts.
I am also a wife, a mom and a stepmom (among other titles) so I’ve decided to start a new series on the blog called “Blended Family Diaries”. There have been so many times where I’ve wanted to write about things related to our blended family or experiences and feelings that I have as a stepmom, but have always shyed away from it. Why? I guess because talking about having a blended family is virtually like telling the whole world I’ve made mistakes and that’s a scary thing. As a blog follower myself, I always appreciate posts from bloggers where they open up more about their lives and I’m able to get to know them more and relate to other things besides health and fitness.
A Bit of Background
I became a mom at the young age of 20. At the time I knew I was young but I didn’t realize just how young I was until I started getting older. Twenty is young. My immediate family (Roger, myself and our kids) has been blended since I was 24 years old. My family grew from one child to three very quickly and then Roger and I welcomed a child together on my golden birthday. The day I turned 25 I was responsible (at least in part) for four young children. I officially became a stepmom of two when I married Roger at the age of 26. Twenty-six is also young. Again, I didn’t realize just how young that was until I started getting older. I’m sensing a pattern here. :) I also grew up in a blended family beginning when I was about 8 years old so blended families are kind of what I know.
Though I will post photos once in a great while, I’m not comfortable sharing a whole lot about my kids online (both my biological kids and my stepkids) for privacy reasons (mostly for their privacy).
B (the oldest; my biological son)
G (my stepson)
Miss G (my stepdaughter)
C (the youngest; our biological son)
Blended at its best, right?
There are several ways that custody arrangements are made in each respective family. I am simply sharing what we do and what has been working for us thus far and to make it easier to understand why I’m writing this particular post. :)
Roger and I have custody of B (though he has regular weekend visits with his paternal grandparents). C is with us all the time and then Roger has joint custody of G and Miss G so we have them every other week for a full week. Sundays are crazy days in our house because they’re always the exchange days. We’re either going from one child to four (B, G and Miss G are back home) or four children down to two (G and Miss G go back to mom’s). It’s always an adjustment for everyone. Typically the Sundays everyone is back home are pretty crazy because everyone’s playing catch-up and then on Sundays when G and Miss G leave, everyone is exhausted – even the dogs.
Still though, on Sundays after G and Miss G have gone back to their mom’s house, I always find myself a bit sad. When Monday rolls around again on the weeks they aren’t here (like today) it feels weird! There is a huge change going from four kids down to two. It’s so much quieter and just very different from the previous 7 days. As much as I’m relieved to have a bit less going on during the week, I can really feel their absence too. My stepkids share a lot of their time with me while they’re here (since I’m home and Dad’s at work) so we’re pretty close. So basically every other Monday I get a case of the Mondays. I feel exhausted from the “busy-ness” of the week prior and anxious because there isn’t as much going on I guess. It’s another adjustment.
I think families are always about making adjustments, but this is especially true in blended families. It’s a challenge and there are bumps in the road, but this is true of any family.
So these are my honest-to-goodness thoughts this Monday morning.
My little blended family is on my heart.
If you are still reading this, you are amazing and I appreciate you for doing so. It’s hard to put this out there but it’s real life. It’s my life and I hope it’s helped you to get to know a different side of me. The very imperfect, behind-the-scenes me.
Time to get some stuff done I suppose!
I hope you’re having a great start to the week so far. :)